Well, I wound up getting a shot anyway; it was exactly 4:00 when I got it. The funny thing is, I didn't even think about it until I drove by the hospital around 2:30—which tells me exactly what I need to do to get through the next time: GET OUT OF THE HOUSE AND HIKE SOMEWHERE! The more I do that, the less inclined I'll be to let myself shut down when I don't need it.
Blake came by around 5:00, but I had to put off the dinner-and-movie night to tonight. Then I felt like shit because I think I hurt his feelings...Blake is an awesome young man who obviously respects me; I fear that seeing me like that yesterday will have damaged that aspect of our friendship. At least he got to see early on what I'm like on Demerol, and why I want and need so badly to stop using them period—unless I'm really hurting, which is why I'm changing it to "blood test required" next month.
[I'm tempted to request thata for the remaining two shots this month.]
YES! I'm going to request that an enzyme-level test be done before I can get my next one. It's time now...
Dr. Garren isn't in today, so I will call her first thing Monday morning and ask that she write up a new one (or I'll write it up and ask her to sign it).
YES!!!!!!!!
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